Connection

Bad relations
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Bad relations

You are not obligated to have relationships with family members who are not good for your mental health.

Whilst I agree with the statement above, I believe that, as adults, we still hold a form of inner relationship with family members, whether we like it or not. In my experience it is helpful to work on those uncomfortable relationships, because the negativity or abuse that came from them towards us will have been internalised during the years we had endured it. Until we have made peace with them within us, we will be triggered by the people who act like those family members. We’ll simply meet them or find them represented in other people we meet and have relationships with. So, yes, turning away or not interacting with those family members who continually agonise us is probably advisable, but we still need to address our internal family system in order to find peace. For that to happen we need to get to a deeper understanding, and that usually happens when we allow ourselves to see a bigger picture.
Both my parents were completely unable to regulate their own nervous systems and therefore snapped every time I stretched their patience. It did not take much to be severely punished. It still doesn’t. Through Family Constellations and other healing work I saw how they grew up, their difficult childhoods, their traumatised parents, the hardship they had to survive, I came to understand where they are coming from, and I find it much easier to be in relation with them. I just continually and consciously decide to be with them in a way they can handle. And inside of me, through all the healing I’ve done, I have been holding them with love and respect, despite their failings. That has given me so much more peace. Meeting negative behaviour or abuse from others I can handle so much better, knowing, we all have a history that made us who we are. And besides, I have in some respects failed my children too.

If you are looking for healing your inner relationship with family members, I suggest to get in touch with me for a free 20-minute chat during which we can figure out if I can help.

#selfdevelopment #familydynamics #FamilyBonds #TheTRANSFORMProcessTM

Find Love Within
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Find Love Within

The title for my upcoming workshop in Abingdon-on-Thames (UK) at Soul Shine Wellbeing Space on 11th September 2021 is “Find Love Within“. It came to me in meditation, and at the time I imagined it to be a brilliant headline that would draw people in. To me it was clear that the lack of Love is what divides us, keeps us distant and lonely, or segregated. I’ve got one person signed up at this point, which means people are not quite understanding what this is about. Therefore I thought I’d write a little about what to expect from the day.

The questions we will explore are as follows:

  • How do we recognise Love?
  • What lies in the way of our path to Love?
  • Are we happy to give?
  • When do we lose ourselves in Love?
  • Are we allowed to claim Love?
  • Can we expect Love?

With regard to Love we’re always at the beginning, and we never know everything.

Silvia Siret

The day will be structured in this way:

  • 09:45 – 10:00 – Meet and greet with a cuppa and a biscuit
  • 10:00 – 10:30 – Sit in circle, introductions, sharing
  • 10:30 – 11:30 – Dialogue about above questions
  • 11:30 – 13:00 – We’ll look into a participant’s love issue
  • 13:00 – 14:00 – Lunch Break
  • 14:00 – 17:00 – More sharing, dialogue, and we’ll look into other participants’ love issues

The tools I’m using are

  • Guided meditation / mindfulness exercises
  • Dialogue according to Bohm
  • Systemic Constellation Work (Family Constellations)
  • Coaching

I’ve been facilitating group workshops since 2006 and am known to hold safe spaces.

These kinds of group experiences always create a sense of awe, bonding, support and hope, as well as the understanding that we all have things in common. Whenever we explore into someone’s issue together, it feels like a huge gift to the rest of us, as we learn so much from each other.

Please, do put your questions into the comments below; others might be interested, too. Alternatively, contact me via my contact tab (see menu).

More info and booking, click here: Eventbrite